saturday’s the day for it. though it’d become bleak with the passin of each week. passion for it have never died since i was in high school, just that at that time i couldn’t fend for myself for lessons till recently. the rate i’m payin for now’s ain’t that worth it for a half an hour class but hey, who am i to say since it’s the market rate after i scouted ’round. not much can be achieved in one hour’s time, leave alone half an hour.
then i was havin lessons on another instrument which lasted two hours per session per week, dreadful at times but most of all – fun. couldn’t play as well as some friends can despite all those years studyin it in which they just completed it within 3 years. imagine those fees paid then, time value of money, i’d lessons since i was 7. the more i think of it, the more i hate my instructor, she’s nothin but a con artist. taught me songs i already knew and seasonal songs which were repetitive over the years. cute, right but bs! and her main focus were always the xams.
maybe i was and still am not musically inclined at heart but i love music. maybe because of the system which has/had/still is screwed/screwin the equation. someone said this to me recently: “never say you’re not good at it, just say ya’d do ya best“. something along that line. it hit as an inspirational mark for a moment before my depression kills all. wonderful.
most likely going into hiatus from my current lessons due to several reasons. one being the discouragement i get from my parents since 4 or so months ago. ahh. afraid that i’d never return for i’m one who does not look back [ at certain things ]. just like the pawns in a game of chess.
too much to handle recently. shall leave with a say i was told over tea just a few hours ago: “look up for inspiration, look down for consolation”. humans & psychology, intriguin. what’s a post without images? hmm. njoy!
